With a mountain of editing deadlines and a neglected Kimi wagging a finger at me, I decided, before getting my head down, to try somewhere new for walking the Olster, reminding myself, as always, to look out for the weird and wonderful.
Only one mile from home, I chose the village of Yaxley and soon realised that I could have been in Royston Vasey.
First up was the woman in pink. She was jogging, pounding the pavement quite heavily, and at first what I thought were two huge bowling balls in her hands, turned out to be her rather more than ample chest, which she clasped tightly as she ran. With a smile on my face, I could not help think that jogging was not meant for her.
Seconds later I drove past a postwoman just as she was turning from her laden trolley, letters in hand, and stepping onto someone’s driveway. The trolley began to roll – quickly – down the slight incline. In my rear-view mirror the postwoman did not reappear, but I did wonder if the trolley would catch up with the pink jogger. However, I could not slow or stop to find out because suddenly there was an ambulance with sirens blaring coming up behind so I had to put my foot down.
Wondering if there might be hidden cameras and this was all set up, I stopped at the local shop – the woman there had a turned up nose and wore glasses.
She did not ask if I was local but I did hear her talking to an old guy about that `lovely dwarf` and `what a lovely fellow` he is. `yes,` agreed the old guy, `but that Ricky Gervais grates on me`
I didn’t really like to ask, convinced the cosmic joker might be having a giraffe on my behalf, so waited until I got home and asked Google. Sure enough, Yaxley is home to actor Warwick Davis (Star Wars, Harry Potter, and recently: Life’s too Short)
Okay, my day has been made so far: pink joggers with built-in weights, runaway postal trolleys, and a famous dwarf actor for a neighbour. Then I found Ollie in the garden, foreleg raised, snout pointed, and knew that the second batch of starlings had decided it was time to leave the eaves.
What a great morning.
Best get some work done.